theLetter To Myself : [Creative Writing]

Adel Alaali
3 min readMar 10, 2022

Hi Futureself, [real names {a letter to myself with a co-existing ‘myself’ from the future.} ]

“I’m Adel, it is a pleasure having the opportunity to make acquaintance. My friend and I are very close to one another; he sourced your contact-info a while back, after asking him for potential mentors.”

“All relationships should be foundationed on unfettered trust; and, to be frank with you, sir — I was surprised, and a bit flummoxed after having your email conveyed. Though seemingly incredulous, the ‘’ nameserver caught me by surprise and was more than what was expected my friend to deliver. Though Alex did well in guising perhaps specificities that may be endearing— my understanding is this: there is a duality in our relationship, almost perhaps a peculiarity from self that's rooted in the Dunning-Kruger effect, naïve cynicism — or, perhaps, the imposters' syndrome.

Meeting a fellow nerd is a profound dream of mine — and having one who is well-accomplished, bears myself perhaps the risk of exposing technical and personal flaws from myself, ironically, to self (Ahh, the paradoxes of XOR and self replication.).

As an adolescent and young-teen , while others had GI-Joe’s and PlayStation to play with, my idealization of basement-based tinkers and young ‘‘web’’ hackers persisted. The salacious ‘hacker’ headlines, after-hour IRC meetups, and my father’s matte-black 56K, multi-tier-logo’d Apple Macintosh + free AOL burgeoned an eternal love for binary, Linux/BSD, and the Open-Source Community. Hence, myself composing, enveloping and lettering-stamping this message to you, today — Adel. Thank you for your time, your consideration of our tutelage, and your graciousness therein.

Having been born into an impecunious immigrant family, where the logos of education defined my understanding of upward mobility — those within the strata of Kevin Mitnick and Adrian Lamo purveyed what ‘heroism’ is and what it could be. Furthermore, the world of binary served as an outlet for an otherwise tumultuous and cataclysmic upbringing. Binary brings me solace. Binary brings me joy.

A demanding father and many books raised me. And therein delved a free-minded spirit, which architected ideology — and, to an extent, my personality archetype (INTJ).

Therein, the interwebs, to myself — were transitive. You see because once my parents went to sleep; that loud 56K modem gatekept, and often piqued my varying proclivities. Ever since the introduction to the internet, my curiosity has only grown greater, thus inherently spearheading my continual fondness for learning things.

To fully share the benefits of tutelage, one must first let go of ‘masks’, and accept that a shared postulation could coexist within the realm of initial misunderstanding and missteps. And for the aforenoted, I apologize. I apologize for not reaching out to you sooner than the date and, perhaps, if possible, I would like to make amends.

Being misunderstood pervades my ethos and having someone that could understand me — in a perverse sense — is the impetus to my many fears. Having traversed life alone, the potential for asymmetric communication — especially with one who is achieved — and, perhaps very wise, is a fear of mine. I recognize this ideology as an oddity, and perhaps even a character defect if not nurtured properly.

With this email being our first correspondence, I understand it may have the potential to be perceived as heavy-handed. However, I have come to suppose the ‘right step’ is always predicated by undeterred honesty — hence the aforementioned^. Should you have any questions about me (personally or professionally), please ask.

More importantly, I look forward to hearing from you and the opportunity to explore any duality that exists between two nerds — whether it’s predicated on commonalities or differences. My contact information is below. My email signature has several links to which you may better understand the aforenoted complexities. And the direct-link above my signature is an honest insight into who I am and what I believe in — I implore you to check it out.

I appreciate your time and would love to hear from you as soon as time permits. Perhaps you could share a bit of information about yourself, as my friend did well in securing your anonymity.”

Adel Al-Aali